Two Poems (August 20, 2010. Issue 20.)
Stubby's Lounge
Every time somebody new walks into the bar, they ask the same question. Where’s Stubby?
Where’s Stubby? They ask the guy behind the bar.
Where’s Stubby?
Every time the guy behind the bar says I don’t know. Or He’ll be back soon. Or I think he’s in the can. Or He overdid it a little last night and won’t be in for a while. Or why don’t you ask his wife. Or he’s at his wife’s funeral. Or he’s dead.
This guy is big and strong looking and has beautiful blue eyes and dark wavy hair. His teeth are pearly. His biceps are Shazamish.
He’s Stubby.
Of everybody that comes into Stubby’s, nobody could look less like Stubby than Stubby. In fact, everybody that comes into Stubby’s is more stubby than Stubby. That’s why he calls himself Stubby. That’s Stubby for you. Really. A swell guy.
A new guy just came in a few minutes ago. Now he looks up from his stubby drink. Is Stubby really dead? That’s a shame he says. And Stubby agrees. It’s a real shame.
Everybody gets kind of quiet. Stubby hates it when everybody is quiet.
LAST CALL! Stubby says. That gets things going. And all the stubbys come up to buy a drink and to give a toast to Stubby. Stubby pours a little drink, too. TO STUBBY! They all say. TO STUBBY, IT’S TOO BAD AND EVERYTHING! It’s not a great toast at all, but Stubby likes it very much. So Stubby takes a drink. His drink tastes funny.
Last Wishes
I would like to have sex
with a dozen people
one after the other after
the other and then open
a book of poetry by
Longfellow, read one poem
and then simply expire
Actually
Make it hundreds of people
one after the other after the other
after the other after the other
after the other after the other
after the other after the other
after the other after the other
after the other after the other
and so on and so forth
after the other and not read
any Longfellow at all! Why
should I read Longfellow? And
after I don’t read Longfellow,
keep going. And then not die.
Why should I die? And then
keep going, one after the other,
after the other after the other,
after the other none of whom
read Longfellow themselves
and not reading
Longfellow myself
and not dying either.
Two Poems (June 20, 2009. Issue 6.)
Fungus
Like the ancient Chinese, I am drawing a picture of a fungus.
It is an artful enterprise.
An artful enterprise that I love dearly.
I am glad to be this person before you.
On with the pen and the brush and the scalpel.
No jade-just me and utensils.
I work tirelessly-if you can call it work-it is not.
It is recess with a large serving of soul.
They say that what you resist, you become.
Well, I am not resisting this fungus.
I am embracing it.
And I am drawing it.
I am drawing it with love in my heart.
I am not very good at drawing fungus.
I like to tell the truth.
And I am swingin’.
And I like to practice things.
Come here, little fungus!
The fungus makes a face at me.
The fungus is making little poopy noises.
Fungus du mal!
The fungus is scampering away!
It is resisting me! The next thing you know,
the fungus has become me.
Any way you look at it, I am a fungus.
Rock n Roll
for Violet
When I walked into the record store and saw you for the first time, I
shouted: “The guitar that changed the world!” You were helping a
customer and I didn’t think you heard me. Then I watched as you,
without missing a beat and without even looking, pointed to a Scotty
Moore album entitled: “The Guitar That Changed The World!”–and
even though Scotty Moore was on the cover of the album with his
guitar which changed the world and a cigarette that he was smoking,
it doesn’t matter: in my opinion, YOU are the guitar that changed
the world–I know it, Scotty Moore knows it, the cigarette (that I
proffer you knows it even though you say No thank you I don’t smoke
at least not much anymore) knows it, the cigarette that Scotty Moore
is already smoking on the album knows it, my dog would ‘sense’ it
as dogs do, and if I had a dog, which would make him know it although
of it he could not speak–everybody, in short, knows it. And because
everybody knows it, the world has already changed. The world is
filled with knowledge. You did it! You see, and you haven’t even
picked up the guitar yet–I wonder what will happen when you do.